Winter gives its breath in waves
of clearer mornings and crisper nights
It whistles past my ears and I sit
knees against my chest
wrapped in mother's quilt, patched
with handsewn stitchwork
Worn and frayed
A tattered shield half-filtering
December's evening
chill of air.
The stars, one thousand penlights
scattering cross the sky's
own patchwork quilt
of constellations, connecting
to my eye and followed
by my outstretched finger
tracing the Great Bear
through spiraling smoke
that dances from half-filtered
habit to despair.
My glowing wand
Gives its breath, enslaves
me with its whispered plight
in streaming deltas
upwards built
stacked freedom from my
sheltered sight
and I inhale December
while catering to dreams
of highways scrolling under me
in man-stitched asphalt seams.
The air hangs in the winter
with time's slow creeping pace
And Ursa's hibernating
in her home transfixed in space.
The miles of sky above me
the miles of road between
January's newborn year
and Ursa's waking spring.














Comments
(No more gold stars. Gold medals.)
--
.
//album art | posters | flyers | book covers | apparel
.
my newest piece
almost
--
nothing
You've implied so much without overstating anything.
while catering to dreams
of highways scrolling under me
in man-stitched asphalt seams.
--
bleed.bitch.bleed
Things I like:
The rhyme scheme, how it starts out sort of liquid and subtle and gradually solidifies and becomes more obvious at the end. I really like the final two stanzas, by the way. I also enjoyed the imagery in the first stanza, I actually felt cold. Of course, that could be because it's December in Minnesota and the window is open.
Things I don't like:
Not much, really, the second stanza seems the weakest to me; the phrasing is awkward in places, but it ends really nicely.
I like this poem, it makes me feel at home.
--
pH 3.7
And the picture is beautiful as well...
Fave.
--
Look. Pink bunnies.
and I inhale December
while catering to dreams
of highways scrolling under me
in man-stitched asphalt seams.
I love the flow of that, and the entire thing of course.
Good to see you writing again.
As of now, I lack original comments, or good ones for that matter.
I must admit that when I saw December in the title I flinched.
The whole 'December' thing seems over-used, but this...
This was excellent.
--
Gleanntán
My love has come home to me,
and we shall never be parted again.
My Prints
try doing this:
It whistles past my ears
and I sit knees-against-my-chest
or
It whistles past my
ears and I sit knees-against-my-chest
something to play with the way those two lines read.
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