utro

three point five years ago my marriage fell apart and i met you. three point five years ago you made me a crossword puzzle themed on our then short-lived time together we locked eyes and i could not-- no matter how i tried ex-husband-to-be at my side-- look away. as surely and meticulously as you drew the squares of the crossword you drew me in. as calculated as the clues, some tricky, some fun, some senseless, some beautiful- you became all these things to me. we were one of those equations (the ones you love so much) that could never make sense to me no matter how long i stared at it, trying to figure it out. But

I miss this place.

I woke today with a determination.  One I hadn't felt in some great time.  A determination to regain my creativity, my inspiration and motivation.  To regain my life, thus leading to (hopefully) a happier future.  I won't go into details, but it's been a difficult 6 months for me, and an uncertain several years.  I don't know what lead me to wake with this energy today.  But I did.  And throughout the day I've thought about how to obtain what I want, what I need to make these changes.  I've reminisced about my past, wrong and right choices, as well as the involuntary circumstances that lead me here.  I played around online, searching for a ne